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Singing for a wedding is an amazing opportunity, not only to expand your repertoire and experience but for also celebrating with a couple on their wedding day.
If you are a cantor who regularly sings for weddings, you probably have this stuff down. But if you someone who is rarely asked to do it, there might be some confusion, misconceptions, or just inexperience.
It’s okay. We’ve all been there, and we have to start from somewhere, right?
I have compiled a list of tips for wedding singing from my experience of about 7 years singing for various weddings in different parishes, states, you name it. It’s not as nerve-racking as it sounds, really!
Thank goodness you are not responsible for the reception music, but you are responsible for many other parts of the Mass and the effect of the wedding Mass (if they are doing a wedding Mass)
[bctt tweet=”Needs tips for singing at a Wedding Mass? Check out this expansive article on the subject.” username=”SpiritualCantor”]
While most people don’t have any idea about what they want for a wedding, others will have an idea about what they don’t like. So ask them for approval.
You can still help pick out music that you like, but make sure they like it, too.
This may go without saying, but if you don’t run it by the bride and groom before the wedding day, you might have some trouble on your hands. And that is the last thing they want (and you, really.)
I have had experiences where the bride/groom don’t really care what music is sung, as long as there is something sung at certain times of the ceremony.
This is a little more stressful, but then you can pick songs that work well with your range, that you are comfortable with, and that can be perhaps sung along with the wedding guests.
Make sure you also stay within the limits of the type of music that is appropriate. If it is a Mass, stick to more traditional music. If it is just a ceremony, you might venture out a little to other Christian or secular songs that may work well. I will give more info on that later.
Need some places to find popular music? Try Muse Score, Music Notes, or 8 Notes.
It’s always a good idea to keep in good vibes with the organist, as they are an integral part of your success with all the music you sing that day. If you badmouth them or refuse to do what they suggest, you could have a disaster. And also have someone who thinks you are a diva and hard to work with. Don’t expect too many other opportunities to sing at a wedding in the future.
Instead, appreciate the hard work and dedication that goes into being the organist. Thank them for playing for you and for the wedding. Wonder in awe at the beauty of their work, because it really is a beautiful thing.
If you are late for the wedding rehearsal or the wedding, oh no! Don’t be that person. Allow for plenty of time to warm up, rehearse songs, etc.
Be in a good mood, too, ready to work, sing, and be the contributor to the celebration that the couple asked you to be. Be sure to schedule a couple of times for rehearsal prior to the wedding day, if necessary.
I once was part of a horrific experience in which we had misjudged the time of the wedding by an hour. The organist and I showed up about 5 minutes after the wedding was supposed to start. We were mortified, but we set up and started the wedding ASAP because they were waiting for us. It turned out all right, but I never want to be a part of that kind of experience again.
Here are some ways to show up prepared to sing for a wedding:
If you need more ideas on things you might need, read 7 Things Cantor’s Need at Mass.
There are the usual classic songs that are often sung (or played) at weddings. They include:
Sometimes brides want to do things out of the ordinary. There are many beautiful settings of music that can also be used, with good discretion.
As part of the wedding preparation process, couples are required to pick out the text of which Psalm they’d like to have. So, based on which one they pick, it can be difficult to find a nice setting for that text.
Sometimes, they just simply have the Psalm read out loud. In that case, you are off the hook!
You can definitely find music for these settings. Many times you can find multiple settings to choose from, which is fun to have a choice and pick the one that works the best for everyone.
I used “The Lord is Compassionate Toward All His Works“. I had to look all over online before I finally found one from Jeff Ostrowski at Corpus Christi Watershed.
When you are a pro, or even a novice, following these guidelines will help you (and everyone involved with the wedding) have a joyful and easy wedding day.
Be aware that you might have to work with someone you don’t know, whether it’s another singer(s) or the organist/pianist. Be a responsible singer and layperson. Oh, and bring a gift for the couple, even if you don’t know them.
Enjoy your chance to sing for a wedding. I always find that the music is refreshing and about love and just fun to sing. It does help when you are singing for something special, as well.
Do you have any experiences or ways to prepare for singing a wedding?
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